Back in the good ol' days (which never were!) they posted a sign in movie theaters. It said: "In case of fire, walk, don't run, to the nearest exit." Of course we kids, in our perverse ways, always looked at it and laughed and said we'd run, not walk, to the nearest exit. This became a thing of the language of the 40's. My guru, Ralph Houston, used to use it in jest, too. He'd say something like "If a Swami offers you a certificate of psychic accomplishment, run, don't walk, to the nearest exit." It was his way of telling us something was bogus and to get out fast! So here's a short list of things you might run across in your spiritual travels from which you might want to make a fast exit.
RUN, DON'T WALK, TO THE NEAREST EXIT IF:
1. Any Swami or guru offers you some kind of certificate of accomplishment in some teaching or branch of metaphysics. The shorter the time it takes to get the certificate, the faster you run!
2. Anyone says Cosmic Cataclysms will occur on such-and-such a date.
3. Anyone says they can or will read your Akashic records--especially for a price.
4. Any so-called "spiritual" person asks you for money.
5. Any "guru" asks you to contribute towards his/her living expenses--or anything.
6. Anyone says they are in touch with a Master.
7. Anyone says they are a Living Master or Mahatma.
8. Anyone invites you to a seance.
9. Anyone invites you to listen to someone who channels someone (See #8).
10. Anyone shows you a map of the world as they purport it to be after the poles shift and the continents break up.
11. Anyone says they have been to Tibet (or even Katmandu!) for their empowerment.
12. Anyone says the Maitreya will appear on a world-wide TV hookup.
13. Any so-called guru promises you spiritual powers.
14. Anyone does pot or drugs, claiming it to be a spiritual thing.
15. Anyone says they are a "walk-in."
16. Anyone tries to dominate or coerce your free will.
17. Anyone announces they have been give a high-falutin' name ("I'm also known as Jor-El... etc.).
18. You are invited to a full moon meditation.
19. You are invited to any so-called "New Age" event where they say they will invoke this or that energy.
20. Anyone wants to hypnotize you.
21. Anyone predicts when the "big one" will hit.
22. Any teaching charges you money for the teaching.
23. Any teacher tells you that if you leave their teaching you will lose any hope of spiritual advancement in the future.
24. Anyone says Jesus died for our sins.
25. Anyone pulls out an ouija board.
26. Any so-called guru asks or tells you to become their disciple.
27. Any teacher/man/woman tells you that you are their "twin soul."
28. Any teacher tells you that you are more "advanced" then the other students.
29. Any teacher says they have the only "true" teaching.
30. Any teacher demands complete obedience.
'nuff said.
Copyright © 1998, Burt Wilson, June 28, 1998